14
Nov
07

If I had a company…

The following is a list of things I would do if I were the head of a company:

  1. Introduce myself to every new employee and try to memorize their name.
  2. Give all my employees directions what to do and tell them who they can turn to when they need help.
  3. Let my employees know that I care about their opinion and that my door is open if they need something.
  4. Give my employees a nice sweater or T-shirt or SOMETHING so they will identify with the company (more).
  5. Have a party for everyone once in a while. (Like a Christmas party.)
  6. Make sure they always have free tea and coffee.
  7. Talk to my employees to find out what I can do to make work more pleasant for them.
  8. Offer everyone a 4-day work week.
  9. Have core hours from 11am to 3pm, if possible.
  10. If an employee does a great job, I’d tell them so.
  11. If an employee doesn’t do their job, I’d tell them that I disapprove.
  12. Yes, you may write emails or look at YouTube videos, but only if you get your work done.
  13. I’ll pay very well, if I can afford it. I’m happy with a decent salary, I don’t need millions.
  14. If the company is big enough, I’ll have a cafeteria.
  15. If the company is really big, you can choose a vegan dish for lunch.
  16. There’d be enough stationery for everyone. You’d even get sharpies and highlighters.
  17. You’d have to push bathroom doors from the inside to open them (so you can push them open with your foot when you leave)

What did I forget?

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